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Bright Yellow Light

It wasn't until this week, and more specifically, when I was in the temple I realized how much my life is filled with fear. I have so many goals, aspirations, and dreams that I want to see happen in my life. However, I feel fear is holding me back. Fear is keeping me from moving onward. 

In the temple I found a quiet corner and I sat down to pray to my Heavenly Father. I felt like I was telling him all of my fears. I normally have many things on my mind, things I need to be worrying about. When I am in the temple, my mind is calmed. What is left on my mind is gratitude for the blessings I do have, and the fears that are my actual fears and not the worrisome things that clutter my mind. I was able to open up and talk about my fears, the real ones. One of the fears I prayed about was the fear I put on my fear assignment this week, "what if my fresh cut flower farm never happens?" 

I'm scared that it will never happen. I'm scared Heavenly Father's plan for me will take me away from that dream. I'm scared I won't even get the chance to try to make it a reality. I'm scared of this dream not coming true. 

As I continued to pray and put my fears on the alters of the temple I received a type of an answer, an impression. It was a light. A bright yellow light. So bright I couldn't see what was in front of me. I felt this light was my future. I couldn't see what was ahead of me, so I'd still have to continue walking in faith. But, I wasn't scared of it. I wasn't scared moving forward in faith.

The quote came to me later was from Sharon Mays, "The only person that holds you back, really, is you." I want to align my will with the Father's, but he also wants me to go after my dreams. He wants me to try. He wants me to live my life by faith, not fear. After the impression I received, I know my future is bright. No matter what it is, and I know I can't let fear hold me back anymore. 

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