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W06 Intimacy and Intentionality

This week I learned about marriage rituals. “Rituals are social interactions that are repeated, coordinated, and significant.” They are the interactions between a couple that helps strengthen the marriage, help it thrive, and keep the couple connected.

 “Rituals are not efficient; they are about connection."

 Our lives can become filled with so many good things, work, school, kids, family, etc. If we aren't intentional with our marriage rituals then they will fall in between the cracks and our marriage can suffer for it. An example of a ritual is when a husband comes home from work, how does he and his wife greet each other? Do they wait for the other to initiate a greeting? Or do they intentionally find each other and ask about each other's day? A dog will react with great enthusiasm when its owner comes home. We could follow that same example. Couples need to find rituals that they repeat, are planned, and are meaningful to each other.

 A place to start is to create a couple for connectedness, love/intimacy, and special occasions.

 Here is an example of a special ritual that Tyler and I have. We remember our angel babies. When those anniversaries come around each year my husband and I talk about how much we love them, miss them, how old they would have been, and the dynamic our family would have if they were here. My husband doesn’t remember the dates as I do, so he sets a reminder in his phone to remind him of those special dates. It means so much to me.

 One ritual we would like to implement in our marriage is a talking ritual. Tyler and I have added so many important things in our lives, children, homeschooling, college education, etc. and we find we have little time each day to be together. We think we could find at least 15 minutes every day where we spend talking. Not about kids, chores, work, or school, but just about us. We could wake up a little earlier or during a lunch break. We feel like we would greatly benefit from this marriage ritual.

 "In the intricate rituals of married life, both God and the devil are in the details. Which is why the crafting of good marital rituals requires care and thoughtfulness."

 Marriage is important and sacred and requires needs tender consistent care from both spouses. Implementing and maintaining marriage rituals can help your marriage thrive!


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